Author of The ADHD Vampire and Mother F'ing Black Skull of Death

My Review of Unicorn Battle Squad by Kirsten Alene

Unicorn Battle Squad

Unicorn Battle Squad. You tell some people that’s the title of the book you’re currently reading and you might get a few odd looks. Who usually hears unicorns and immediately thinks it’s going to be something cool, or even have action and violence? I’ll admit it, I wasn’t so sure about this book when I decided to read it. But it has a cool cover and the quote on the front – ‘Somewhere between Kafka and My Little Pony, only even weirder than that sounds.’ By Ben Loory really piqued my interest. I was happy to find out that a book about unicorns can be cool, really cool.

Here we have Carl, a low level clerk living in a dangerous city that’s on the verge of falling apart. Where he usually goes home to his father and eats boiled cabbage for dinner, one day he goes home to find his father missing. After a little snooping he discovers his father had purchased something but not yet picked it up. Carl decides to go get it hoping it will lead him to his father. What he ends up getting is a sickly unicorn, and the beginning of an epic journey.

The action really begins when Carl is taken in by the unicorn riders protecting the city. These guys are like big, crazy Viking types who ride battle worn, steroid pumped unicorns. Carl joins them in a battle against a seemingly unstoppable army. It’s amusing to read about weak and wimpy Carl just trying to stay alive much less assist in battle.

This book really took me by surprise. I remember when Kirsten Alene had a book in the New Bizarro Author Series, Love in the time of Dinosaurs. I never read it, but now I find myself wishing I had. And after Unicorn Battle Squad I will. The words original and unique get thrown around a lot when talking about bizarre books, but I don’t know of any better ways to describe this book. Between the landscapes of the desolate city, or the vast desert Carl finds himself in. Or the interesting and strange characters like the obese princess of the Theklanian army, this book is wildly entertaining.

I have to mention the one downfall to this book, the ending. I don’t want to spoil anything for anyone, but I surely hope Kirsten Alene was planning a sequel. And if she does one, I’m looking forward to it.

Buy it here Unicorn Battle Squad


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