Author of The ADHD Vampire and Mother F'ing Black Skull of Death

My Review of Garrett Cook’s Archelon Ranch

This book took me by surprise. This is another one I got without any prior knowledge of any of its content. Starting into it that first chapter struck me as really strange. Now I like weird stories, and so far I haven’t found anything that I thought was just too much, but with this I found myself questioning whether I may have finally found it. But I read on, and I’m so glad I did. Once I got into the second chapter everything changed, I was hooked. This was one of those can’t put it down books for me, I wanted to forget about anything I had going on and just read this straight through.
Telling the story of human test subject Bernard we are treated to a fantastical world where dinosaurs roamed free, and gilawalrus’s came out to hunt when the wind comes, and the dreaded surbanites that live past the malls wander free. The main characters in the book know that they are living in a book, created by Garrett Cook, and that one day a Protagonist will arrive. Clyde believes that his brother Bernard is this protagonist. Against the wishes of the Narrativists, which are the followers of the church of Authorial Intent, Clyde decides to set in motion events that will prove his theory about his brother. But Bernard is one track minded, he just wants to find Archelon Ranch.
Now I haven’t been exposed to much Meta fiction. I feel like if done incorrectly this style could be annoying, in the wrong hands I would hate such a story. Luckily Garrett Cook wrote this, and he is a very capable writer for such an under taking. The characters are genuine, there’s not a dull one in the bunch. And Cook keeps the book paced fast enough that you may have to stop and reread certain passages to make sure you took in everything on the page.
Garrett Cook has written a compelling tale, one where I was virtually on the edge of my seat hoping for Bernard to escape the city and make it to Archelon Ranch. This is a must read for fans of Bizarro, and I would easily recommend it to those who are not also. Plot preserve.

Buy it here Archelon Ranch at

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